Winning the Dating Game

I wrote the following and posted it up not too long ago on a Friendster bulletin board. I post it below for your reading pleasure until I can think of something more meaningful to write about...

An extended period of life in the UK has exposed me to some home truths about the laws of attraction inbuilt in each and everyone of us. Being a heterosexual guy I hold these truths to apply mainly on girls, but beileve that they would work equally well with girls should they care to apply these principles on guys as well.

1-Millions of guys out there fall for girls and spend indefinite amounts of effort on them, slaving away at getting their approval, yet are never successful. They cling to them, shower them with attention, return their calls, yet appear destined to remain dateless. Yet every so often one sees a message by girls detailing that all girls want is for their boyfriend to SMS them everyday and shower the with gifts. If this held true in ALL cases, should these guys not all be attached already???

2- The thing is, the saying that the more tightly one holds something the less he gets of it is not a myth here. The reason for this lies in a flawed perception in peoples' minds of what it takes to impress the oposite sex.

3-Gentlemanliness IS the answer to a good relationship, and especially if you are sure the girl likes you. It's not, it seems, however, the answer to a good first impression. People say that a good first impression is based on chemistry. I say that that Chemistry has to come from somewhere.

4-Whether or not an immediate confession of love succeeds therefore hinges upon whether or not it is one-sided. If it ain't you're in luck. If it is, well....then good luck! The good news is, however, that I believe Chemistry CAN be cultivated, so don't give up just yet!

5-Exclusivity is one thing that contributes to this. It explains why all stars have massive followings from the opposite sex. You treasure something you need to work for. Playing hard-to-get and appearing not to be desperate appears, from my observations, to increase one's value in the opposite sex's eyes. Desperation and pliability- being able to be controlled easily by another- however, are BIG repellants.

6-Over the years I have cultivated in myself a gentlemanliness-not really because I wanted to be liked or but rather because it has been in accordance with my moral and philosophical principles. In an effort to make everyone I know happy I have answered their requests whenever they called, given them a hand whenever they asked. Always have I sought to be around for those in need, and never have I declined a request fulfillable within my reasonable means. By and large I have succeeded, and possess a college- wide reputation for being one of the "nicest" guys around. Dependability and reliability have bothe worked to counteract my niceness, however, and I have, since my arrival here, remained constantly dateless. Here and now I therefore declare all of this bulletin true, and hold myself as evidence that it is. Should any girls happen to disagree with me, however, I remind you once more that I am still dateless, and would welcome you all with open arms.